Honda Car Forum

Got a friend who asked me to look at her '94 accord as she has a speedometer
that is on it's last legs. It will work fine at some times, and won't work
at all at some times. Most of the time it just holds around 20 mph no
matter how fast she goes.

I think it is the Vehicle Speed Sensor, but just wanted to get some
opinions.

The cruise control acts up whenever the speedometer is acting up, if that
gives any clues.

I do not want to replace the VSS and find out it is the speedometer head.

Thanks for ideas and past experiences,

Matthew Brown
Memphis

Matthew Brown wrote:
>
> Got a friend who asked me to look at her '94 accord as she has a speedometer
> that is on it's last legs. It will work fine at some times, and won't work
> at all at some times. Most of the time it just holds around 20 mph no
> matter how fast she goes.
>
> I think it is the Vehicle Speed Sensor, but just wanted to get some
> opinions.
>
> The cruise control acts up whenever the speedometer is acting up, if that
> gives any clues.
>
> I do not want to replace the VSS and find out it is the speedometer head.
>
> Thanks for ideas and past experiences,
>
> Matthew Brown
> Memphis

Since the cruise control and the speedometer both act up at the same
time, it is very unlikely that the speedometer head is bad. Some people
have reported that cleaning the contacts where the wire harness plugs
into the VSS has solved their problem. If this does not work, there is a
good chance your VSS is bad. The VSS is around $100, more from the
dealer, less from http://www.hondaautomotiveparts.com. On that site, the
VSS is under System\Component = Engine wire harness - clamp.

no religious taboos against swine.

1 large toddler or small child, cleaned and de-headed
Kentucky Bourbon Sauce (see index)
1 large can pineapple slices
Whole cloves

Place him (or ham) or her in a large glass baking dish, buttocks up.
Tie with butcher string around and across so that he looks like
he?s crawling.
Glaze, then arrange pineapples and secure with cloves.
Bake uncovered in 350° oven till thermometer reaches 160°.



Cajun Babies

Just like crabs or crawfish, babies are boiled alive!
You don?t need silverware, the hot spicy meat comes off in your hands.

6 live babies
1 lb. smoked sausage
4 lemons
whole garlic
2 lb. new potatoes
4 ears corn
1 box salt
crab boil

Bring 3 gallons of water to a boil.
Add sausage, salt, crab boil, lemons and garlic.
Drop potatoes in, boil for 4 minutes.
Corn is added next, boil an additional 11 minutes.
Put the live babies into the boiling water and cover.
Boil till meat comes off easily with a fork.



Oven-Baked Baby-Back Ribs

Beef ribs or pork ribs can be used in this recipe,
and that is exactly what your dinner guests will assume!
An excellent way to expose the uninitiated to this highly misunderstood
yet succulent source of protein.

2 human baby rib racks
3 cups barbecue sauce or honey glaze (see index)
Salt
black pepper
white pepper
paprika

Remove the silverskin by loosening from the edges,
then stripping off.
Season generously, rubbing the mixture into the baby?s flesh.
Place 1 quart water in a baking pan, the meat on a wire rack.
Bake uncovered in 250° oven for 1½ hours.
When browned, remove and glaze,
return to oven and bake 20 minutes more to form a glaze.
Cut ribs into individual pieces and serve with extra sauce.



Fresh Sausage

If it becomes necessary to hide the fact that you are eating
human babies, this is the perfect solution.
But if you are still paranoid, you can substitute pork butt.

5 lb.

seasoned bread crumbs
1 onion
minced
salt
pepper
butter
olive oil

Pound the breasts flat (parboil first if using umbilical
cords so they won?t be tough).
Place a slice of ham and cheese on each, along with some minced onion
then fold in half, trimming neatly.
Dredge in flour, eggwash, then seasoned breadcrumbs;
allow to sit for a few minutes.
Sauté in butter and olive oil until golden brown,
about 6 minutes on each side.



Shish Kababes

As old as the hills, this technique has employed seafood, beef, pork, lamb,
poultry, and vegetables; just about anything can be grilled, and young humans
are no exception!

High quality marinade (Teriyaki and garlic perhaps)
1 inch cubes of tender meat, preferably from the nursery
Onions
bell peppers
Wooden or metal skewers

Marinate the meat overnight.
Get the grill good and hot while placing meat, vegetables, and
fruit such as pineapples or cherries on the skewers.
Don?t be afraid to use a variety of meats.
Grill to medium rare,
serve with garlic cous-cous and sautéed asparagus.
Coffee and sherbet for desert then walnuts, cheese, and port.
Cigars for the gentlemen (and ladies if they so desire)!



Crock-Pot Crack Baby

When the quivering, hopelessly addicted crack baby succumbs to death,
get him immediately butchered and into the crock-pot, so that any
remaining toxins will not be fatal. But don?t cook it too long,
because like Blowfish, there is a perfect medium between the poisonous
and the stimulating. Though it may not have the same eff