I think the cold idle speed is the issue. When you're shifting to reverse with the engine cold, you're
shifting with the engine at 2000 rpm, same as if you had your foot on the gas. Of course it will jerk. I have
the same symptoms as you, usually I wait until the revs go down to at least 1200, and then the jerking is
far less violent. It might need cold rpm adjustment. (Haven't looked into that over the past 6 or 7 years I
had the car...)

As for your tranny, welcome to the club. But to tell you the truth, I'm puzzled given you have such low
mileage. My tranny started slipping only now, with 220k on the clock. I changed tranny fluid and added
some cleaner/sealer substance (don't remember the name, something like Trans X or similar) as per
instructions on the bottle, then after 150 or so miles changed tranny fluid again and the issue improved
significantly, but did not go away entirely. Some say that Honda brand tranny fluid does magic - have not
tried that yet.